Saturday, February 19, 2005

27...... and counting

I was watching this movie the other day and the man goes..... "yeah once you hit 27 it's just a downhill slope towards death".... that sun of a&*$#^^. I turn 27 tomorrow... and i'm like... where did 20 go?... i was just there... i put it down on the table and the next thing i know i'm pickin up 27's ass.... Even Lisa goes.... "yep... my baby's gettin old."

We had this deep ass converstation the other day.... After out 1st anniversary... awww... our first date was on Valentine's Day last year.... she started talking about stuff i aint never thought we would be talking about....

were lying on her bed and she asks me "You ever think about, like if me and you were to get married where it would be..."...Shock!!!Freeze!!Spin!!... i think to myself... "Where the fuck am i?" surely this has to be the wrong apartment... cause my girlfriend is commitment challenged... so i thought.... I just looked at her... probably crazy as hell cause she looks away "What??.... what you mean like a wedding??"..."I don't know"... i lay my head back on the pillow kinda fucked up "Think about it." she says "... what's our favorite hot spot?" ... "Pensacola??" "Yeah she says... that sure would be a beautiful wedding".... "OMFG" i think to myself.... she's fuckin wit me

a few days later she calls me while i'm in class.... i call back about an hour later.... "hey huny bunz 2" she says after the 2nd ring "Hey huny bunz 1" i say..... "u call me"... "Yeah... you comin up to give me a hug?"..... "just a hug??... you gon have to do better than that to get me up them steps..." .... *laugh* "okay... u wanna have some fun (code name for boom boom)" "aight... i'll be home in a few.....

30 minutes later i've gotten my hug... she tells me she feels guilty cause she's not at home to care for her mother with MS(mutiple sclorosis) and she doesnt want to leave me "I want us to be togther" she says.... "I want us to have a family.... I don't want you to be bored up there but its a good place to raise a family."... "your such a good daughter...." i say "I think we can stay together.... i'm with you reguardless of wether your down here or not, but i have to finish this program...but don't let me stop you from going home... your mom is more important..." ..... we hold each other for a little while.... we play as usual..... make jokes and look at our shadows against the wall.... "you got class tomorrow!!" she interrupts me dragging her across the floor with her leg "my class aint gon save you girl..... lol... just playin".... "imma go"....

On the way out... another hug... she looks at me in that strange way she does sometimes... i can smell her soap and notice the mole above her right eyebrow.... as i'm holding her i cant remember feeling it was so natural to hold somebody.... i think to myself..... i'll be a lucky woman.... and she would make a beautiful... smart... sweet little baby...... and i think this is love.

I couldn't tell you what she was thinking because i'm probably 278.75 lbs to biig to fit in her head.... but on the way out she says to me "Yeah look on the internet for some good tickets....". "St Louis on the 23rd.... through the 27th.... okay" i say" "Oh" she says raising her arm and adjusting the pillows on her bed "... and we gotta take them pictures... like at Walmart... you know thay got them cheap deals..." ... "aight babe... " i say "i'll call you when i get downstairs"...

and it blows my mind... that she loves me....

Read a good book an got all in it...
tried a lil yoga 4 a minute....
but it wont let go..... Erykah Badu... Worldwide Underground...I want you #4

Luv Syol

Thursday, February 17, 2005

HMMM..... first and foremost.... thanks to the luvlie ellebrown.... (u sexie biaaaattch..).... for updating my site and reminding me why i did this shit in the first place..... U beautiful guh!!

Second..... hopefully i can get a chance to blog eryday... or erioutha.... cause they keep a nigga busy as fuck..... i caint tell you how may crisis i had to deal wit today..... didn't even get a chance 2 talk 2 my girl and say hey..... Sorry Kristie....

So what have i been up to.....
NOT SHIT!!

.... just playin..... naw i been working and gettin my nursing school on.... i've been gettin my love on with my girlfrind Lisa who has been my girl and my friend..... truly... lil bit of travlin... almost killed myself at Christmas when i drove 11 hours to Miami and God knowz how may back..... just 2 see my momma....

hmmmm... whut else.....?????

tried to buy a house.... man that shit is a bank breaking fucker.... and at the last minute the lady decided she didnt want to sell.... ole hoe!!... her ass was trippin..... but it would been a good deal an shit so i was blown for a minute even though i aint tell nobody.....

..... i got smarter... learned a lotta stuff this year.... book stuff and lyfe stuff.... and learnin eryday

.... i'm in love.... i luv luv her... not just wanna fuck her luv her... cause at one point i stopped wanting to fuckat all..... and for yall that know me u know that shit is a stretch.... i think it was cause i stopped taking that Zoloft shit.... uh oh.... dont sue me zoloft now.... i think its sum good shit for people that really need it.... but i didnt'... i likes my sadness.....

but this is a new Chapter of Syolstice.... nu me.... nu u.... nu day.... nu world....... hopefully we can vibe!!

<3 the imperfections within yoself
Syol